Resolve the Conflict in DC

What is the problem?

I try not to watch the evening news anymore! That’s a strange feeling for someone that has been a news junkie all his life. But times have changed. The elephants and donkeys are at war, fiscal conservatives can’t get along with social conservatives, and progressives are fighting moderates. 

I understand that conflict is inevitable but reasonable heads need to deal with it properly. If an organization is going to move forward (or backward) there is bound to be some who object to the direction. Centuries ago Sir Isaak Newton developed basic physical laws of motion. To paraphrase Newton;

“Whenever there is a force on a body that puts it in motion there 

will be an equal and opposite force opposing that motion.”

Friction is the equal and opposite force that opposes moving bodies. Therefore, any individual, organization, business, or church is will encounter serious friction when they begin to move. Friction, in turn, will result in heat - the more movement, the greater the heat.

In any organization, poor leadership can lead to conflict. Over the past half-century, there has been a decided lack skilled leadership in the Whitehouse, Congress, and our political parties. Instead of leaders, we have had politically motivated individuals placed in the top positions.

Good leaders would have confronted conflicts before they reached the impossible stages. But issues have been stuffed and solutions postponed. When major issues are not handled properly and timely we end up with the problems we have today in Washington.

Let’s take a look at how minor conflicts can eventually destroy reasonable discourse. Without intervention, conflict can spin out of control in a downward spiral. At each stage, the conflict gets worse and becomes more difficult to resolve. Therefore conflict needs to be confronted early before it falls into the next stage.

Stage 1. The Remedy Stage. - “Fix the problem”

Characteristics of this stage:

1. Recognition that there is a problem.
2. But there is disagreement on how to solve the problem.
3. Parties want the problem resolved and can make a commitment to solving it
4. There remains a belief that the problem can be solved.
5. There is still honest communication between parties involved.

If the problem is not solved conflict at this stage it will move to stage 2.

Washington has passed this milestone decades ago.

Stage 2.  The Re-Positioning Stage

Characteristics of this stage:

1. The focus is beginning to shift from solving the problem to protecting one’s self.
2. People are nervous.
3. In discussions, they begin to speak in generalizations. “You always are like that.”
4. The level of trust between parties has dropped to “Low.”
5. Now communications is guarded and cautious.

If the problem is not solved in this stage conflict moves on to stage 3. Again, we are past this stage.

Stage 3 Rights Stage - People declare their rights.  -  “I’m right so you must be wrong.”

Characteristics of this stage:

1. Each side believes they are the good person that has the only possible answer to the problem.
2. Each side of the conflict now seek others who agree with them and everyone has to pick which side they are on.
3. People become labeled.  (Carnal Vs Godly) His side or Her side
4.  The solution shifts from resolving the problem to winning.  “Whoever can recruit the biggest team will win.”
5. Communication becomes exaggerated and distorted.

If the problem is not solved at this stage the conflict will move into the “Removal” stage. 

It looks to me we are way past this point.

Stage 4. The Removal Stage  - “Get rid of those people.”

Characteristics of this stage:

1. People are no longer satisfied with getting their own way.  Now they have to get rid of the opposition.
2. The Goal is divorce.
3. Other people are now in respective camps.
4. There is a clear leader in each camp.
5. Trust is now gone.

If the problem is not solved in this stage it will move into the “Revenge” stage. 

Aha! We are getting close!

Stage 5. Revenge  Stage  - “Make someone pay.”

Characteristics of the “Revenge Stage.”

1. People are not satisfied with resignation.
2. People have now become fanatics.
3. The conflict has become a personal God issue.
4. They feel it is immoral to stop fighting.

The conflict has now gone way out of bounds.

It appears to me that the conflicts in our government today are somewhere between Stage 4 and Stage 5. There is still hope if cooler heads can bring the sides together.

Constructive Conflict Management

It is time for someone to step up and take charge and set the tone for resolving the current mess! Use good conflict resolution methods! 

• Agree on a time and place to talk it out.
• Assertively, honestly express your feelings
• Depersonalize. Focus on the problem, not on the person
• Select a neutral referee
• Develop a positive mature attitude
• When something goes wrong, search for a solution.
• Focus on specifics and simplify the situation.
• Be open and available
• When problems arise, work them out.
• Listen, wait and learn
• Forgive and forget

Please forgive my shamful plug [see below] for my latest book, but the book was inspired by the present political climate in Washington. 

Check out my new book, "Conflict Resolution for Dummies."http://www.aslanpress.com/conflict-resolution.html

Bill Johnson

Seven Reasons to Start Your Own Business Now

Why should I start my own business now?

When I was a child, my father started several businesses. It was a roller coaster ride, sometimes successful but mostly not. As a result of this early experience, I chose the safe road and became employed in corporate America, pretending a lack of desire to be my own boss, Steadfastly toeing the corporate line and receiving my bi-monthly pay check, I enjoyed a comfortable life. But something was missing. There had to be more than the routine. So while still employed, I began to prepare myself for a future in a different field entirely - so as to not be disloyal to my employer. When all was ready, I resigned my position and dove into the unknown. After starting my first business I discovered the thrill and excitement of starting a business. Now after starting several businesses, I can give you four reasons why I believe you should start your own business.

The first reason to start your own business now is: Your life has become too routine, too predictable. It is time for a little excitement. It is time step out and take a chance.

The second reason to start your own business now is to overcome fear, Fear had kept me from realizing the need that lives within most of us, the need to become the person God created us to become - or at least to try. There is a risk to starting a business. Small businesses can start on the proverbial shoestring - which means there is little financial risk - but there is an investment in time and emotions. Any time you start something there is the risk of failure. However, if there were no risk, life would be boring. Everyone needs a certain amount of risk to get the juices boiling. Taking a risk is healthy for your body, soul and spirit.

The third reason to start your own business is economic. As our nation has been in economic recovery for the past eight years, the unemployment figures are improving, but family income has not risen with the increase in employment due to an decrease in working hours and a loss of the middle class. With more time on our hands we can start a business while remaining employed. The income from your new business could replace all that was lost due to additional costs of living and less income.

The fourth reason  to start your own business is to develop autonomy, and begin to move toward your God-given destiny. Deep in my heart there was a desire to be more autonomous and implement my goals and ideas. Abraham Maslov called this autonomy, "a fully functioning person" or “self-actualization.” 

The fifth reason to start your own business is to fulfil your creative urges. The Lord created all of heaven and earth and we were created in His image. He gave us the desire and ability to create. Each of us has different talents and gifts which we can use to create. Some paint beautiful pictures, some create fine music, some create poetry and tell stories, but all of us have great ideas. When we develop our ideas into a means of earning money we have created our own business.
The sixth reason to start your own business now is that the time is right. It is right for you. If you have read this far, you have been thinking about starting a business. It is time to take the first step and trust the Lord to lead you in the right direction.

The seventh reason to start your own business now is it is the right time in the state of the nation and its economy. We are in the slowest recovery from recession in our economic history, but things are moving forward. Winners are the ones that jump on a rising wave. 

Whatever your ideas may be, it is time to turn them into something tangible that you can build on.

There is a sign on the wall of an Anglican Church in Suffolk England that has been there for since 1730.

A vision without a task is but a dream

A task without a vision is a drudgery

A vision with a task can change the world.

A great tool for finding your specific business can be found at: http://www.aslanpress.com/destiny.html